The Ups. The Downs. And the shit.

Hey... I know im bloggin quite a lot these days... i have my own reasons..
Rite now.. again... I still do feel like im running out of time and i cant do anything about it..
I am constantly thinkin bout whether if we do get to meet up before you go..
But you and I know that its hard for you to get past your parents...

Im sorry that we have this distance problem..
And all this while i never compliment you much..
Well now is the time i do so...

I-L-W-R.
I like it when your being yourself and not faking.. ( i hate fakers. Lolz )
I like it that your an amazingly pretty girl that like just landed in my hands..
You might not see how pretty or beautiful you are, but just ask ppl around you...
Just anybody...
They will say that you do really good and attractive... Trust me...
Most of them will say that and im sure of that...
Dont let words bring you down, dont ever ever let that happen..

I like it when you laugh..
Cuz when you do, you laugh like a 3 year old and it really shows that your genuinely happy...
I like you a lot cuz i seem to find characters i dont find in other girls..
Honestly you have a strong heart that had withstand a whole lot of hurt and you're really patient with me...
We never quarrel and thats good..
I thank you for actually letting me in to you..

I like the way you dress and all.. It always attracts me.. No matter how simple or complicated..
I know saying this is odd but its just cuz i dont have a good sense in fashion? Lolz... Im a lazy guy..

I like how you treat me... I really do..
Different ppl treat me differently..

I like it when you pour out to me...
Telling me what you think bout certain things...
I never want you to stop telling me things...

Well there are lots more of other stuff but i dont wanna say it now.. =P
And here are some of the things that i feel... ( to dear readers you must be thinking * oh here we go again * )

I dont like it when you get bullied...
I dont like it when you get hurt..
I dont like it when sometimes you just suddenly cut of from me...

I seriously want to go to your past... Really..
Undo everything bad thing that happened to you...
Even the smallest thing...
* by watchin some show * They say ' Change the past, you change the future '
And lets just say that rule applies and i do get to go back to your past..
I dont mind if i dont get to be wit you..
As long i know... Your enjoying your life...
From childhood to teenager-hood...
Cuz without all these bad stuff happening to you..
Your like would just be perfect..
And a girl like you just deserves at least a nice childhood..
Without fears traumas and scars that are still visable...

I decide to blog again cuz i may never know when will you get to read my blogs again...
You might be busy with school.. And friends... And books..
Im not prepared for whats to come.. Honestly..
I really wished that all good things dont come to an end... Life would be so screwed up...
I really love you... I just put all my hope in you..
By bringing this up I hope you dont stop doing it but..
Whenever you say you want my hug.. or anything like that..
I just feel so dumb and useless... Its not like its a mission impossible..

Why does the thought of 2 weeks coming always come to me?
Why does it always bugg me?
Its very very annoying..
Its tiring me out...
I wish... i just really really really wish.. The days that we plan to go out works..
It would just suck like hell if it doesnt..
And it would double-ly suck if i cant be there for the farewell thingy..
Its so retarded that i dont live nearby... I know..
Its so easy for you to go out with your friends at the hosp..
So so retarded...

I want to be the 1st person who have sticked to you and never go..
I dont want you to go either...
But its hard for me to make you wanna stay with me...
Cuz im not around often..
I dont want to depress you.. Im just telling you whats going on in my head...
I want this relationship to work out really well no matter what no matter when or where we are...

I want you to be with me.
Really.
From the bottom of my heart.
Just dont leave me.
Plz remember that i exist and that i love you.
Please...